Thursday, July 20, 2006

Start All Your New Years Off Right

''Ah'm sorry...'s just...birthdays always make me cry...''

Because, really, we call January 1st “the New Year” thanks to little more than the efforts of a power-mad Roman Emperor and a Polish math nerd on contract from the Pope. Not to be too anal retentive about it, but our “new years” don’t actually start until our birthdays. Both dates are, after all, a really good excuse to get shit-faced, make a fool of yourself as you try to hit on that girl you found so hot, and, with God’s help, illicit some pity sex.

My girlfriend brought this up. She’s not in town at the moment so, naturally, no pity sex for me. Doesn’t mean she didn’t have a good point. It’s one I think this country of self-absorbed, over-stimulated, perpetual adolescents should’ve probably realized a long time ago. Maybe if they had, we’d all get our Birthday’s off. To recover, if nothing else. There’s only so much water you can drink before you go to bed at ten-thirty.

My usual sleepy time being 2:30 a.m. (on a good night). Sleep is, after all, for the weak.

I knew I should’ve kept up with that weight lifting class.

Ah, well. G'night.

Tags: Umm...yeah, not really worth it, I think.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

23

Ever feel trapped between the voices in your head and the recieved wisdom of what other people believe you "have" to do?

Yeah, that's about how I feel right now.

Happy Birthday to me. It's been a long July, and there's reason to believe maybe this year will be better than the last.

Maybe.

But I'm not holding my breath.

Tags? Fuck tags. I'm tired and a little drunk and it's my birthday. Fuck tags, and goodnight.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Shit Hits Fan in Middle East, American Government Removes Coat, Rolls Up Sleaves, Grabs Shovel

I find it amazing how many on all sides of the current conflict seem to have already acquiesced to the inevitability of this new war in the Middle East. Four more wars, indeed, and the Gasman marches on.

On Friday, Our Glorious Leader took time out from a busy day of G8 summit prep-work to denounce Iran and Syria. His loyal cheerleader, Tony Snow (late of Fox News) told us from the comfort of President Bush’s crotch that “Iran and Syria also have a choice to make which is whether they continue provoking and supporting terrorist organizations within the region,” He then pleaded with journalists to ignore the striking similarities between this statement and similar ones made by his predecessors in their lead ups to the wars for Iraq and Afghanistan.

Seems we have another escalating war on our hands. And wouldn’t you know it, just in time for the mid-term elections. Wow.

Meanwhile, half a world away, the crazed leaders of Hezbolla are fleeing through the neighborhoods south of Beruit’s airport, the kind of horrific ex-urb that would probably face low flying, big engine planes on any given day of the week. Okay, so this week maybe the planes are dropping “precision guided missiles.” (Which, by the way, is about as big an oxymoron as “military intelligence” or “the U.S. Department of Justice.”)

This band of scuttling cockroaches is supposed to be a ruthless terrorist organization bent on the annihilation of the Jewish people? This band of ignorant, small-minded fools who saw a troop withdraw from southern Lebanon as a sign of weakness? I’m supposed to accept them as the villains of this piece, and through them the remaining two Mid-East detachments of the Axis of Evil.

The Usual Gang of propaganda papers have already kicked their tires and stoked their fires. Can you hear the drums? Michael Laden, of the National Review.

It is very good news that the White House immediately denounced Iran and Syria, just as Ambassador Khalilzad had yesterday tagged the terrorist Siamese twins as sponsors of terrorism in Iraq.


William Kristol of the Weakly Standard:

The right response is renewed strength--in supporting the governments of Iraq and Afghanistan, in standing with Israel, and in pursuing regime change in Syria and Iran. For that matter, we might consider countering this act of Iranian aggression with a military strike against Iranian nuclear facilities. Why wait? Does anyone think a nuclear Iran can be contained? That the current regime will negotiate in good faith? It would be easier to act sooner rather than later. Yes, there would be repercussions--and they would be healthy ones, showing a strong America that has rejected further appeasement.


All of which ignores the overwhelming military assault Israel is displaying, with little or no regard for any of the spirituous evidence connecting the Hezbollah to Beirut to Iran. Or Syria. Most domestic news sources have focused on the financial implications of the story: its effect on futures markets, consumer spending and the driving force of our empire, the price of oil. Occasionally a human interest story will emerge through the chatter, but they are few and far between. Certainly there are no images of this, or any armed conflict’s final costs. Images of burning buildings, shot from neighboring hills, are acceptable, but it must be the same one, played over and over again, like those shots of the Towers collapsing.

According to Arthur Silber, it doesn’t matter whether Iran was responsible for anything or not. The connection is immaterial, as our Executive Branch has already decided to start a war.

I see that some people are questioning whether these recent attacks "were green-lighted by Iran." This is, still one more time, arguing about intelligence, and about whether it's right. Once again: intelligence is irrelevant to major policy decisions. If you're arguing about whether the intelligence is right -- in this instance, about whether Iran is behind these attacks -- you're playing right into the Bush administration's hands. Why won't people see this?

Let's say we knew for a fact that Iran is behind the attacks. Does that mean we should start the bombing tonight? No, it does not, unless you want to start World War III in earnest, and possibly bring on a nuclear Armageddon.


[Snip]

With regard to Iran, we have a card of profound significance to play; thus far, the Bush administration resolutely refuses to play it, or even consider it. We could grant full diplomatic recognition to Iran, and begin very broad negotiations immediately: on Iran's willingness to stop supporting terrorist groups and instead aid in anti-terrorism efforts; on Iran's relations with Israel; on Iran's desire to pursue nuclear power; and on many other subjects. Iran has made a number of overtures over the last several years that emphasize that this is precisely what Iran itself wants, but we refuse to engage that country except in the most strictly delimited ways, and even then, only with great reluctance -- and in a manner that makes meaningful discussion impossible.


Mr. Silber is one hell of a writer and a new personal inspiration, if that means anything. His blog is a testament to someone with a cast-iron stomach for the depravity of the human animal. His argument is, basically, our Glorious Leader’s gang follows a set pattern. They pick a target and message reality to fit their preconceived justifications for aggressive war. They are thus pre-meditated war criminals, and subject to all applicable laws.

Is anyone, anywhere, suggesting we go all Nuremberg on Bush (II) and the resurrected Tricky Dick (II)? Is anyone suggesting the United States use its diplomatic weight to force a ceasefire on the parties? Is anyone, anywhere, asking either of the opposing sides, “Are you people fucking crazy? You do know you’re killing each other…right?”

No.

The powers that Be have apparently acquiesced to this war, allowing it to continue for whatever reasons they see fit.

What honestly scares me is how quickly the public at large seems to have acquiesced as well. A coworker turned to me, also on Friday. I’ll call him Wellford, because he resembles the Quaker Oats man and former rodeo clown in more ways than I’m sure he’d care to acknowledge. “Doesn’t it seem to you like a world war situation?” he asked me. It was eight o’clock in the morning and I was still asleep with my eyes open.

“You assume the first one ever ended,” I told him.

He blew air through his nostrils in acknowledgement. Yet his remark (more of a casual comment, really) kicked something over in my head. The historian Howard Zinn once cribbed this observation from an (unnamed) female student: “War is like cyanide, one drop and you’re dead.” I’m beginning to think war is a lot closer to the waters of Lethe. One drink and you forget your basic human morality. War (particularly distant war against small, brown people) becomes numbing, debased, even common. It increases the amplitude of its own inevitability. So much so that my coworker can blithely, and brazenly ask if I agree with his assessment that “it seem[s] like a world war three situation” to him.

I’d say God help us, but the two oldest gods of the Middle East are apparently helping themselves to double handfuls of their faithful followers. Well, okay, maybe not double handfuls on the Israeli side just yet, but you wait until those ground troops land. Oh, yes, ma’am, just you wait.

Occasionally, I contemplate my own solution to the Middle East Crisis. I came up with it years ago. Around the time of President Bill’s Camp David meetings, in fact. It’s a monstrous, Watchman-style plan, only without Ozymandis’ eclectic taste for mass murder and bastard children of science and technology. I would give all the god’s children at least six months to relocate, with U.N. aid workers huffing around the clock to get everyone the bloody hell out. Then, well…can I say this without getting arrested? Or getting blackballed by Homeland Security? How many times must I emphasis that I wish no loss of life to any living human being. I deplore violence, especially the organized violence that is war, and seek only a redress of Middle Eastern greviences with the least possible amount of bloodshed and suffering.

To that end, I wonder if it would just be best to irradiate the entire strip of land? Relocate its people wherever they could go (or leave those who chose to stay…but only with the full knowledge of what they were staying for) and shower the place until it glows in the dark for the next five million years. Then if Elohim and Allah still want to fight their dirty little proxy war they’ll have to do it without humans as we know them today.

Besides, Dr. Manhattan was right. Nothing ever ends…an aphorism that is certainly true of the Middle East…even toxically radioactive elements eventually decay.

Of course this is no real solution. If I, or anyone, were to ever accomplish such a thing it would no doubt only inflame tensions on all sides. It would be Superman IV: The Quest for Peace all over again, except in the really real world, where the really real leaders of the military-industrial-infotainment complex have quite the hard-on for smiting those who oppose the status quo. Much like the gods they worship, now that I think about it.

I’d rather not, but I find war distracting in the worst of all possible ways. Look at it here, and look at me, look at all of us wallowing in our own supposed futility. Where are the protests? Where are the riots? Summer’s here and the time is right for fighting in the street.

But I know. It’s hot outside, and too damn hard to fight for peace and justice. Why bother? Why care? Why do anything but sit, idle, like the fat lumps we all know we are and stare into our machines?

Why indeed, when its so much easier to just roll over, throw our legs into the air, and believe it's already been decided for us. After all, it probably has.

Tagnation: Current Events: Israel: Lebanon: Iran: Syria: War in the Middle East: George W. Bush: Watchmen World War III: The Apocalypse

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Today's Cryptic Words from Jesus H. Christ

Nothing of particular note today. I only have a few quotes from your savior I'd like to save. From gnosis.org

"Perhaps people think that I have come to cast peace upon the world. They do not know that I have come to cast conflicts upon the earth: fire, sword, war. For there will be five in a house: there'll be three against two and two against three, father against son and son against father, and they will stand alone."


and, even better,

The disciples said to Jesus, "Tell us, how will our end come?" Jesus said, "Have you found the beginning, then, that you are looking for the end? You see, the end will be where the beginning is. Congratulations to the one who stands at the beginning: that one will know the end and will not taste death."


Don't know why I my interest in such matters would be peeked of late. Couldn't have a thing to do with recent world events, could it? Nothing new about blood in the Holy Land, is there, now?

Tag lines: Jesus Christ: encouraging words: Gnostic: The Gospel of Thomas

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Shamless Self Promotion

Not that anyone reads this...thing...but I've just gotten around to uploading my review of Superman Returns to And You Thought It Was Safe. It's a long piece of bile-driven screeding but it's done and I'm always proud of them one they leave the nest.

I so need to redesign my website. It's current layout dates from sometime in the middle of Our Glorious Leader's first term. I'm bored with it, in all frankness. Have been for some time. My search for a job brought most of my creative projects to a screetching halt. I am now Five unfinished short stories to the wind and counting. Everyone I know is either broke or barreling towards it. My girlfriend is across the country, where she'll remain until...the Goddess knows. In a week I'll be 23 and I've already officially nominated 2006 for the coveted title of "Crappiest Summer Ever."

Linear time can be such an unfeeling bitch. Now that I have the stupid job I keep waiting, expectantly, for the feeling of security I've been told its finanical rewards bring.

I suspect I've been lied to.

When I get some time I plan to write a long, detailed essay about the uncanny similarities between my new job's training program and cult indoctrination. If I'm careful, if I'm clever, and if you, Constant Reader, eat all your vegitables before desert I might just violate a few Confidentiality Agreements for you.

Tagitation: And You Thought It Was Safe Movies Superman Returns reviews wage slavery The Crappy Summer of 2006

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Today's Uplifting Music from Senator Orrin Hatch (R-UT)

I like to tease my webmaster, Nathan, with the continuing adventures of his state's senior Senator. He lives in Utah, where it's hot as blue blazes and by the grace of God they are lucky enough to have a Senator who knows the gays must not marry, who knows the video games must not be violent, who knows the flag must remain un-burnt, and who by God, knows that the terrorists illegal immigrants must not win corrupt us with their singing in foreign languages. The Lord knows they've already do so much with their marihuana.

In this spirit, I bring all of you: Hatchmusic.com. As the website says,

Music became an integral part of Orrin's life at a young age. Even though his parents, Helen and Jesse, were very poor, they made great sacrifices to allow their children to experiment[...]with different instruments.


The best compilation of theocratic balads since young Johnny Ashcroft stepped down from the Justice Department.

Tag, you're it: Orrin Hatch Republicans Utah music Nathan Shumate politics politricks John Ashcroft

Sunday, July 09, 2006

"Democracy" in Mexico

The polls closed over a week ago. The election is too close to call. Thousands take to the streets demanding a recount as the opposition candidate (who’s already been branded a loser by the international press) assures his supporters that he will fight to the last to get every single one of their votes counted.

Ohio, 2004? The Ukraine, 2004? Venezula, 2002? Or Florida, 2000?

No. It’s Mexico, our neighbor to the south. Last week’s contentious Presidential race— between Felipe Calderon of the ruling, conservative, Party of National Action, and the former mayor of Mexico City, Party of Democratic Revolution candidate Andres Manuel Lopez Obrador—was officially called “too close to call” by the PNA-controlled election commission yesterday.

Greg Palast is, as with so much else, keeping his eye firmly inside the hurricane. For the past week regular dispatches for Mexico City have appeared on his website. They provide a sharp, contrasting picture to the tepid, occasional coverage afforded Mexico by the mainstream press. Even Palast’s sometime employer, the BBC, has already called the election for Calderon, despite the obvious disparity between the exit poll numbers and Election Commission numbers.

Where have we seen that before?

In the Ukraine, barely a month after widespread stories of voter fraud failed to gain traction in America, wild variation between official counts and exit poll tallies led the United Nations (and States) to denounce Ukraine’s fraud-ridden sham of an election. No one (apart from Congressman Conyers and the crying voices of Air America radio) dared to bat an eye at this irony. It passed without notice on these shores.

Now Choicepoint Inc. (the database company responsible for the infamous bogus felon list of Florida, 2000) has lent it services to Calderon’s PNA, turning over reams of data on millions of Mexican citizans that the company collected in clear violation of Mexican law.

Our Glorious Leader has already welcomed Senor Calderon to the international club of right wing, idiot savant politicians…though there’s some dispute between the two leaders as to whether they’ve actually met before.

Together they could make the most powerful barbershop quartet on the planet, once Bush and Calderon joined up with that mad bastard Prime Minister of Canada and whoever’s President of the Dominica Republic this week. They could call themselves The Unelectables and hit triple platinum within a month…so long as Karl Rove is their road manager and Choicepoint their marketing company.

It would be glorious, and just as absurd as what’s already happening out in the real world

Tags:

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Rain of Fools

My roommate (and best friend, who does not hate me…yet) informed me I should’ve watched the fireworks.

My adopted state of Oregon does not allow private citizens to possess the hurtful things. As a card-carrying resident of a Blue State I am “led” (that is ruled over) by people who believe the main responsibility of government is protect we the people from ourselves. (As opposed to the Madisonian style of government that rules the Red states, declaring as our Found Father did, that, “The primary function of government is to protect property from the majority.”) No fireworks that leave the ground, or contain more than X amount of gunpowder. Those are reserved for the state, county, and metropolitan government to cash and carry. And every year, at precisely ten p.m., fireworks explode over the river that knifes through my fair adopted city.

I walk out to the pavement, barefoot and smoking through bloody gums. Explosions ring out through the Willamette River Valley for precisely five minutes. Then all is still. Apart from the sirens. The shouts. The drunken ramblings. The laughter of kids. And we can’t forget the many and varied secondary explosions from all over the city. Call those concerned citizens taking the law into their own hands. Vigilante patriots who just can’t let this day pass without blowing something up. Sure, you can tap their phone, peek into their bank account, arrest them on sight at any Port of Entry, freeze their credit cards, destroy their rental history, withdraw federal student financial aid, and lock them up in a four-by-four foot steel wire box on a hot beach in the south of Cuba…but, by God, they’ll be damned if they let the fourth pass without blowing something up in the sky.

(And whatever you do, don’t question how they celebrate their national holiday. You’ll be immediately earn the label “whinner” or “sissy,” or “bitch.” You’ll be asked what the Founding Father’s would think of all this tripe and if you know you’re history then you’ll admit, “They’d probably hate me. George Washington, the Burner of Villages, would probably have me shot me on sight, like those men who led the Mutiny of the New Jersey Line.)

Often I dream of flying, but I’d hate to fly on the fourth. Last night I dreamed a dream…but now that dream is gone from me.

Why do I hate America?

Plenty of reasons. Among them the fact that I must continually repeat them in face-to-face communication.

Today’s Encouraging Words come from Howard Zinn:

“War is like cyanide: one drop and you’re dead.”


As Will Hunting said, “You want a good book, read People’s History of the United States. That book’ll knock you on your fucking ass.”

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Fear and Loathing on Our Nation's Birthday

Let’s recap.

On this national birthday, in this evil year-of-our-Lord, 2006, in this hive of fugitives, in the midst of desperation I have managed to:

• Start a cross-country fight with my girlfriend over the phone, having not returned a call due to a previously arranged pressing engagement in town. She is currently 1300 miles from the side of the bed she claimed and by all the gods that ever were I miss her. Long-relationships are, by their very nature, beset with stress, mostly due to the extended period of time it takes to communicate any emotion, be it anger, catharsis, or (as was the case we me here) shame.

• Lose a job

• Beg my parents for money, something I despise, despite their overwhelming willingness to give it to me, usually at the slightest provocation. I do not mind prostrating myself before authority figures for monetary gain. (For what is a job but “Yow’sa, massah!”-ing the boss? There’s a reason we’re called wage slaves.) I mind the ease with which I secured the funds. A similar species of trusting ease has repeatedly burned my grandparents. Their sons (my uncles) are not as honorable as I am, and more time goes by the more I think they no longer have the capacity to feel what I am feeling now. Either that gene is carried exclusively on the X chromosome or they surrendered this capacity somewhere during the 1980s.
• Receive said money.

• Pay rent

• Piss off my roommate, who is also my best friend. I have a strong suspicion that she no longer trusts me. Were it any other person, I would care less. But it is her and she is the one who, long ago, picked me up when I was down. She is the one I turn to when I need my moral compass checked. We have forged this relationship over years and I depend upon it as sure as I depend upon the gravity keeping this keyboard on my desk.

True, I’ve been a jobless fool the past…well, nine months…true, I am at times and inconsiderate jackass. But, Lord God, I had no idea it had professed the point where she would accuse me of theft.

Until today.

I feel the Fear that I am Loathed and am imbibing alcohol to cope. This is not a problem so much as a temporary solution. At best I will pass out and wake tomorrow in time for a scheduled job interview.

I know I should devote a few words to American, the Beautiful…but I find nothing beautiful in the civilization that invests this land. It has given me nothing but pain, heartbreak, insecurity and disgust. I pray for rain. I pray for tidal waves. And right now I have a special place in my prayers for another rum and coke.

Ah, there it is.

Happy fucking Independence Day. May all your democracies be exported through military force. As Chairman Mao said, long ago, "Change must come through the barrel of a gun."

Tags:

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

New Review: The Adventures of A Neurotic Internet Film Critic

Let’s see. I’ve had one hell of a past twenty-four hours.

First the File Transfer program I utilize to update my website (Ipswitch Pro 2006) decided to up and quit. More fool I for downloading the damn thing off isohunt. The search for a freeware program that would do the same thing consumed several hours. Fortunately, I discovered Smart FTP, a reasonable facsimile of Ipswitch that’s offered free of charge to poor bastards like myself.

Unfortunately my search took me far into the bowls and back alleys of these here internets, allowing my computer to contract several malicious Trojans, viruses, and a veritable shitload of adware. Their combined might overwhelmed my poor, outdated antivirus program, forcing me to update it’s sorry ass before I could do a blessed thing.

The program, I must tell you, is the shiz-nit. Its name is Panda. Panda Titanium, and while that would make a wonderful name for a band it makes an even better piece of anti-malware. Now, I’m a fairly anti-consumption kind of guy. I’m fairly stingy when it comes to praising this-or-that produce (just look how long it’s been since I gave a movie a five-star rating). Apart from the latex condom (which has save my life many a time) I’ve rarely found a piece of modern technology worth as many of my kudos as Panda.

I could’ve saved myself the trouble and just asked Nathan, my webmaster extraordinaire, where he got a-hold of his copy of Ipswitch…but that would’ve marked the third time I’d troubled him for the damn thing. Third as in, Third time’s the charm. Third as in, Three strikes you’re out. Third as in, I’m neurotic, okay? Gimmie a frickin’ break. I’ve got viruses coming out the woodwork.

And dear Lord its time to shut this thing down and go to work. Outside my window the sun is shinning bright enough of bleach the sky. I’m staring down the belly of an hour long commute, plus eight hours of sitting around on my ass. Only the promise of air conditioning holds any solace for me.

I know this is fascinating. The Adventures of a Neurotic Internet Film Critic. It could be a sitcom, a monthly column, or a comic book.

Somehow, in all of this, I managed to review Shaun of the Dead. Another three-G film. What a surprise. Makes you wonder: are these movies really three-star shows? Or have I been doing this so long, run so much movie-related verbiage through my brain, that I’ve sent whatever shred of perspective I once had ass-over-teakettle?

I’ll be thinking about that over the course of the next eight hours. Because I certainly won’t be thinking about work.

Monday, June 19, 2006

Hopeful Words From Noam Chomsky

"Organizing against the occupation is far easier now than it was at comparable stages of the Vietnam war. The Iraq war was unique in hundreds of years of history of Europe and the US. It is the first act of aggression that elicited enormous mass protest against a war before it was even launched. The spirit of opposition remains alive and widespread, far more so than in the 1960s. And as then -- or in the earlier civil rights movements, or the later women's, environmental, anti-nuclear, solidarity, global justice movements and others -- small sparks can ignite large-scale commitment that may seem dormant, but is just below the surface. That is how every achievement for justice and peace has been won in the past, and there is no reason to suppose that the future will be any different."


From chomsky.info

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Watering Netroots

There is no subject more depressing, more spent, more trod upon than politics. At least, for me. I’m a current events junkie. And an absolutist. As such, mine our opinions widely held by other current events junkies, radical activists and arm chair political quarterbacks from here all the way to Daily Kos…where I’ve just registered for membership.

Why the hell not? I figured. The worst that could happen: I waste hours of time reading through hundreds of largely short, largely sweet, and occasionally grammatically incorrect postings on a wide variety of issues. And do…what exactly?

Nothing. Except reading and writing, posting back. I feel like I’m fifteen again, when the Internet was green a good, before the Millennium came and went without bang or whimper and the crystal cracked.

The Internet is a glorious thing. James Burke saw it coming, and like so many voices other voices throughout history his was lost in the wilderness. Drowned out by the sound of timber company chainsaws. Because who watches BBC, anyway? And even if they do, who takes something they can use from the experience?

Apart from me, that is. I’ve gone out and got myself a shinny new world view, complete with its own overarching socio-political philosophy. It is an anarcho-radicalist vision of the present backed by a real politick understanding of the past. Unfortunately I am no Karl Marx and cannot offer some glorious utopian vision of the future. Our old friend Karl (and this is one of those statements that’s so idiotically obvious it seems almost a waste to mention) was a product of his particular time and place, and according to the reality he made for himself, History was the glorious story of the proletariat’s inevitable rise to power.

We saw what came of that. We saw what Mao, a century later, made of it. Their little red books glare out from my bookshelf, along with dozens of others, and mock me in my literary impotence.

I am not Karl, or Father Mao, and do what they have done. Nor do I want to. Their ideas have killed more people than Hitler’s. I read the words inside those books and see the gulags of Siberia, the closed universities of Manchuria. I see young men and women torturing their college professors. I see writers dying for daring to critique the words inside these little red books and I know I cannot be Karl, or Mao, or Ho Chi Minh. I won’t have others killing for me…more than likely, I’ll be killed myself. Purged like Trotsky and barely remembered, found face-up in some ditch by the side of the road.

And besides, the world has moved on, as Roland of Gilead says. Books no longer have the power they once held. Since when have you seen the disheveled youth of this or any country rallying en masse with books over their heads? The Cultural Revolution only worked because, back in the sixties, people actually read. More importantly, they carried the words with them, into the streets. The same is true for the American nineteenth century Labor movement, and for its twentieth century protégés: Civil Rights, Feminism, Environmentalism…every –ism under the sun.

Yet, that was then. This is now, and this is the year of Yearly Kos. Thousands of bloggers gathering in Las Vegas meet, greet, chat and (of course) blog their way into forging a distinct, organized political movement.

And it appears to have worked, oddly enough.

Yet, as abysses go, this one’s gaze is mighty arresting, particularly at times when it appears to degenerate into a dialectical (or, worse, ideological) circle jerk. In my lurking and my thinking I’ve come to the (admittedly unoriginal) conclusion that political debate in this country is a dead road to nowhere, on both sides of the isle.

In case you haven’t noticed, Mid-term elections are coming. And so far everywhere, from Montana to Virginia, California to Kansas, Vermont to Rode Island to my own adopted home, the story is the same. Low voter turnout. Apathy. Greed. Corruption and misuse of power. No hope. We hear that the American public has woken (as if they’d been sleeping for six years) to discover the horrible ineptitude of those who hold sway over the government. Presidential and congressional approval ratings have tanked in the high thirties. Congress has responded in a glorious display of total ineptitude by giving themselves raises and more vacation time. This Congress will be in session fewer days than the famous Do-Nothing Congress of 1948. They’ll add insult to injury by wasting our time (for we are the ones paying them) debating gay marriage, flag burning, and other red-meat, froth-at-the-mouth non-issues of our day.

Meanwhile, Democratic Party strategists and concerned citizens across the net are scratching various body parts, trying once again to debate and define the stances, philosophy and coherent narrative of “our” party. As if it is, somehow, “ours”.

Yet, it can be, in a way. Thanks to this “glorious” technology real live direct democracy is actually possible for the first time in human history. Any citizen of with computer access (that is, access to a library) can waltz in, sign up for a blog, and send their voice into the digital wilderness. They can sign up for free email and fire off correspondence to all four hundred and thirty-six Congresspeople in minutes (or hours if, like me, you are easily distracted).

It’s not too radical to say this internet is the best tool for democracy since the invention of the printing press. Like Guttenberg’s gold letters, this Internet provides an open forum for the continuous discussion and dissemination of ideas. Ideas that spark action, that spark movement and organization. Indeed, it seems a lot of this country’s problems stem from the replacement of actual political organizing with cocktail party gossip mongering by the same (increasingly smaller) group of people with disposable incomes and pretensions of a social conscious.

They (like the rest of us) are too busy caught up in the day-to-day rat race to really care about politics. Their social action is a veiled attempt at social climbing, smoozing and boozing. They are the campaign consultants and their rich friends, the contributors. We’ll get nowhere waiting for that cavalry to come and save us from the proto-fascist mess we’re in…or, worse, we’ll get what George Custer got while he waited in vain, that is, we’ll get dead.

Yet I’m depressed. As I said, Mid-term elections are coming (already here in some cases, see California’s 50th District) and the great debates of the most often generate (or de-generate, depending my mood) into discussions of tactics. Most specifically, the tactical question of Karl Rove. More specifically still, a tactical question that comes down to one phrase so insidious it cannot even be countenanced: That is, how many of our enemy’s tactics can we used? How do we “win” (which, in these times, amounts to “how do we game shattered, debased, poisoned political system”) without becoming what we hate?

The simple answer is, We don’t. We can’t. We are too moral, too conscientious, and too damn poor to do what our nemesis Turdblossm has done. Nor should we want to. His divisive, debased tactics have only piled shit upon the already fragrant compost heap that is our political discourse. And they work. They (combined with selective gerrymandering and the occasional outright fraud) win elections, as they will again this November.

I do not write that without some pause, for it is an ugly fact, and I will do my best to change it. That is, I’ll vote, and knock on every piece of wood I can find in the hope it will be counted.

And in the mean time, I’ll suggest that the great debates of Daily Kos be realigned, brought outside the box of everyday politricks. We, like the conservatives who so despise us, do not need to waste time defining ourselves for the American public. We have a wide and varied history of political writers (mostly from the last century) who’ve already done the hard work for us. We hear about Lee Atwater, George Will, and William Buckley. But fuck them. We’ve got JFK (Profiles in Courage) John Dewy, George Lakoff, John Rawls…hell, we’ve even got Noam Chomsky if none of those can sate your palette.

We also have the harsh fact of a disaffected, unmotivated, apathetic populous that considers itself “too busy” or (worse) too stupid to get involved in the political process. As Chris Hayes says in his excellent article on Yearly Kos,

YearlyKos made it clear that the netroots is a vanguard—a smart, savvy, compassionate and courageous vanguard, but a vanguard nonetheless. There's nothing wrong with vanguards, but they do not a majority make.


But as I explained to the man I buy my cigarettes from yesterday, “You can understand anything, so long as it’s explained well enough for you to understand.”

We must go out unto the people, just like Jesus told his homies, and explain the situation to them. We must do it without spin, without rationalization, without sloganeering or unabashed bullshitting. We must do it to as many people as possible. Our friends. Our neighbors. Our fellow citizens and human beings. We will get nowhere waiting for some “charismatic” leader to pop out of the woodwork and save us all. If we are a movement we must move, and it can be as simple and as easy as moving two steps down my sidewalk to knock on my neighbor’s door and ask, Hey, how ‘bout a beer and little chin wag about politics. That is the key to any form of victory. It is the glue that’s held together every mass movement in history. It also the only thing that has ever really changed the world.

Think about it. Then do it.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Slice of Cheap, Wheat Life

I'm outside, smoking, thinking of gods and monsters while our neighbors walk past me on the stairs.

There's a skinny black man with a cardboard box spilling out of his arms. I get up to let him past and he sets it down on the concrete. He says, "Nah, that's cool. I'm goin' back for more stuff."

I nod. —Whatever man. Don't wanna ash on your stuff.

I step aside as he moves back to the parking lot. Upstairs a window opens and the sound of a TV at full blast fills our non-courtyard. Stirring strings of music, unheard since my childhood, float down and I know the TV is playing a trailer for that new Superman movie.

There's a low, scraping sound. The sound I hear through our ceiling. For the thousandth time I wonder what the fuck they're doing up there.

Then a girl comes down the stairs. Skinnier than the man, and lighter. She's got coffee for skin and black satin for hair and I try not to look too hard. I don't want her to see me checking out her teeth for signs of the dreaded Meth Mouth.

She speaks to the black man, who's got another box in his arms. She tells him where to put it and I know its *her*. That it's her voice I've heard screaming out of open windows in the night. That she's the one who's kept me awake and broken the flow of words with her inarticulate imploring.

I try to think of the most personable way I can tell her, "Hey, you know you're voice carries, right?"

I crush my smoke into the dirt and gather myself. She and the black man are walking up the sidewalk. She's talking at him and not offering any help in carrying his load. Not even looking at the cardboard box of assorted household crap he's already placed beneath our spruce tree.

As they're approaching the stairs the girl is on my side. I think back to my canvasser training. I make eye contact. I stick out my hand. I've got a smile on my face and a snarky comment in my mouth, waiting to get out. I stick out my hand.

And she walks right past me. Doesn't even break stride. My presence doesn't even make a dent in her world as she tells the black man exactly where he can set up his armful of stuff and that he'd better hurry. They (whoever they are) are moving furniture up there and the need his hands.

The cardboard box is still there, underneath our tree, when the door to Number Eight slams shut.

"Bitch," I say. Louder than I wanted to, with the windows open and all. The sound of a new Jimmy Olsen telling a new Perry White to look, up in the sky, seems to drown it out. No one cracks open Number Eight to peer down and wonder who would dare to besmirch our neighbor's name.

No one does and I go back inside. Back to my gods and monsters.